Unleashing Transformation: Embracing Difficult Conversations and Creating Change (Dustin’s Story)

Dustin Thatcher has a new view of the uncomfortable moments that are ever present in human interactions. Specifically, he now sees them as fertile space for transformation. Where in the past, Dustin shied away from conflict, he now moves toward it with curiosity, a hint of playfulness, and a deep knowing that the sweet spot on the other side holds promise of connection, learning and change.

“In the past, I dreaded the thought of having difficult conversations. I’d have to prepare myself … talk myself up. I was worried I wouldn’t know the right things to say, or the have answers to make things better,” he said. “Now, I view these conversations as opportunities. We will figure things out together and co-create. I totally trust there’s a way through things and I’ve gained some confidence in my ability to help get us there.”

The skills he eagerly employs are ones he gleaned from coaching training. Coaching embodies a style of communication that is built on trust and empowerment, with an aim to propel self awareness, growth and change. While Dustin proclaims the benefits of coaching for anyone who interacts with others, he has found it to be particularly life changing in his approach to interacting with families, and in leading teammates in his workplace at Pacekids, where he is an occupational therapist and Clinical Lead. 

“A lot of my job involves managing conflict and guiding others. Working with complex children calls for complex strategies and effective communication with both the kids and the adults in the room who will execute the strategies. In the classroom, I am always looking for ways to flex my clinical skills. Coaching gives you strategies for building trust and igniting change,” he said.

Dustin also leans into coaching practices in his side hustle as a qigong instructor, where he applies his post graduate certificate in pain management to help people with persistent and chronic pain find relief through movement.

“I use coaching strategies a lot in this environment for those quick conversations I need to have that will help people understand their injuries, but also to help them see possibilities for the making changes that can help,” he said.

Catching the Coaching Train

Dustin has participated in a variety of coaching programs, but he resonates most with the learnings he gleaned from Foundations of Coaching course with Invoke Coaching.

“One of the biggest things about Invoke is their ability to cultivate a safe environment. Almost instantly, I felt like this is a place where I can share real things and no one is going to judge me. I might fumble my way through a strategy and things I say might not quite land – but either way, it’s okay, I’m safe to explore here.”

Over time, Dustin said he began to see a shift in his approach to communicating. He was no longer walking into a challenging situation feeling like it was his job to solve it. “It was important to see that each person in the conversation has agency and we are all free to say what we need and hear each other out. Once I let go of the outcome, it changed everything for me. It was liberating. It removed the pressure I was putting on myself to have all the answers, and I could just learn and have fun,” he said. 

Dustin also highlights several of his favourite aspects of the coaching model, including ‘design alliance,’ where participants and leaders jointly choreograph the training sessions; and ‘landscape exercises,’ where participants find language for what they are feeling by exploring new perspectives using metaphors.

“I also loved that Janelle and Nic asked us to bring real situations with real emotions to these sessions, so we didn’t feel like we were role playing,” said Dustin. “There was so much I took away from these sessions – and most importantly, I know it is lasting change for me.” 

Points for the Home Team 

In his personal life, coaching is commonplace, since Dustin’s wife runs a coaching business, helping guide professionals to manage stress and burnout. Consequently, the two often find themselves talking out strategies, and engaging in practice sessions together outside of work.

“My wife says she see a shift in my confidence since I took the Invoke training … as do other family members and friends. They notice that I don’t avoid conflict anymore – I’m actually looking for opportunities to engage with them in that problems-solving space,” said Dustin.

“I can’t really say enough about how much coaching has improved things for me. It turns out, deep listening and making connections fills me up. I find coaching conversations energizing and lifegiving!”